Why did this death seem so disturbing to me? After all, it's not the first death in the show, let alone the first on the big (or little) screen. We frequently see people die in movies and TV. Even more, the scene was hardly believable; I'm no medical professional, but it's hard to believe that someone who has the shit beaten out of them (to the extent of death) is not only coherent nonetheless conscious. And let's not forget Sam Merlotte's attempt to comfort his dying brother with cliche visions from story books of what death will be like.
I guess, at first, I didn't think it was possible that Tommy was going to die; I thought surely he would pull out of this just like he has pulled out of many a close call. Even when Alcide says that he has a right to choose his "time", I thought it couldn't be so. But, at a certain point, it seemed inevitable that this really was Tommy's time to die.
Perhaps it is I, and my own struggle with the concept of death that disturbed me. Death happens every day to thousands of people. We consider it as such a trivial thing; When you hear on the news that a handful of people died in a freak accident, it's sad, but mostly a headline. There's no emotional attachment; simply a fact of life. However, for the individual, and those around them, this is perhaps one of the most important moments of one's life: the end of it.
To see someone die is kind of a big deal. The sad thing about Tommy Mickens, is that he was sort of unrecorded. He lived under the radar; no address, no family, no one except an estranged brother, to notice if he was gone. Sam could so easily toss Tommy's deceased body in a shallow grave and no one would have missed him.
It begs the question, how many people do disappear or die and no one ever notices? How many people experience the most important moments of their lives only for no one to never even notice that they are gone, let alone that they ever existed?
The idea of immortality is the basis for almost every religion- the idea that we continue forever is something we all want to cling to. For me, immortality is not so much a tangible, physical idea; Rather, it is what we do in our lives to influence the generations to come that really demonstrates us living forever. So, to see someone like Tommy Mickens, who no one will ever remember, is tragic. And in some senses, disturbing.
Fortunately, Tommy did end up, in some small way, influencing other peoples' lives. He didn't have a building named after him, didn't have kids to carry on his genes, etc. But no doubt there were people that felt his impact, whether good or bad, in their lives. So, I suppose even those who disappear into thin air will have some impact, somehow.
I hope people notice I die. I hope they care, and I hope that my loved ones participate in my passing, understanding that this will be one of my most important moments. I don't care if they mourn, if they bury me in some special casket with some special headstone. I just hope they know how important that moment is to me when it comes.
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